Parent Tips - Social Media Awareness and Internet Safety

Kids are so tech-savvy these days. As concerns parents, guardians, educators, counselors, and family members, we need to be vigilant in keeping kids safe. Cyberbullying out-numbers physical bullying 10-fold. Predators are not enticing your teenager with candy from a van; they are "catfishing" in chat rooms. As a counselor, I have heard horror stories from children and parents about messages through text or apps, videos, and pictures that have been used to embarrass, bully, trick, manipulate, and harm others.

Adolescence is the 2nd fastest growth period of a person's life (after infancy). Due to all of these rapid changes, teenagers are especially prone to rely on and misuse social media.

                                                        Why?????

• No matter what genetics a teen may possess, they are impressionable and adding social media to the already prevalent peer pressure only ramps that pressure up further.

• Self-disclosure is strongly associated with increased activation in brain regions that form the mesolimbic dopamine system, including the nucleus accumbens and ventral tegmental area.

• The immediacy and reward associated with social media (especially through mobile avenues) can be thought of as a 'quick hit' and would be expected to result in a minority of users experiencing 'addiction-like' symptoms.

• Egocentric – Its about me, me, me

• Highly Curious about the "Real World"

• Prefer Active Learning to Passive

• Moving from Concrete to Abstract thinking

The following information is not meant to be scary. The information is provided for 1) awareness, 2) guidance, 3) tips.

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Statistics:

·         In 2009, 22% of teenagers log on to their favorite social media site more than 10 times a day. In 2014, 70 percent of teenagers age 12 to 17 spend time on a social media site in a typical day. In 2015, 93% of teens use social media daily.

·         More than 50% of adolescents log on to a social media site more than once a day.

·         75% of teens own cell phones

·         Studies indicate that family involvement in children's education steadily decline as their children move from elementary school through middle and high school(Epstein, 1986; Epstein & Dauber, 1991)

·         Family involvement in education helps produce increases in student attendance, decreases in the dropout rate, and improvement in student attitudes and behavior (Rich, 1987; Sattes, 1988)

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Negative Outcomes of Social Media:

• Because tweens and teens have a limited capacity for self-regulation and are susceptible to peer pressure, they are at some risk as they engage in and experiment with social media

• Some young people find the lure of social media difficult to resist, which can interfere with homework, sleep and physical activity.

• Young people can harm their reputations and safety by posting personal and inappropriate information. And information about sites they visit may be captured and used to target them with advertising.

• Negative body image and poor self-esteem increases

• Those that interact via social media on a daily basis are 5 times likelier to use tobacco, 3 times likelier to use alcohol, and 2 times as likely to use marijuana.

• cyberbullying and online harassment

• sexting -  pictures or words
  
• “Facebook depression” - this is the phenomenon that occurs when an individual does not receive instant gratification from someone (anyone!) "liking" or commenting on a post. Even negative responses are preferred to no response. (Can you say SCARY??)
  
• lower school grades

• Advice and guidance from peers, not adults.

• Encouragement from peers to engage in self-harm (cutting, drugs, sex, suicide attempts, risk-taking behaviors).

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Positive Outcomes of Social Media: from a study in Pediatrics (2011) :

• Help develop improved technology skills

• In moderation, social media can be a great way for teens to connect to others, discuss shared interests, to relate to their peers, and to express themselves

• Learn about people with varied backgrounds

• Enhance their creativity by sharing musical and artistic projects

• Expand their ideas by creating blogs, videos, and podcasts

• Collaborate on school projects outside of class
  

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Tips: [from AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) guidelines and from my personal experience.]

• Supervise online activities via active participation and communication with child, in addition to using technology monitoring software

• BE AVAILABLE: SET UP PRIVATE TIME

• Utilize family meetings and family dinners without technology

• Teach online etiquette

• Be media savvy – know who your child’s “friends” are, know the apps and websites, become their “friend”

• ORGANIZATION AND GUIDANCE IS NEEDED

• Be Available: Encouragement not Praise

• Set Clear Logical Values-driven Rules. Be tolerant and patient, but not a doormat

• Set limits – amount of time per day/time to shut off all electronics at night/rules for using technology

• Make Smart Phone agreement, such as “no phones in bedroom after ____(time)” and “no downloading apps without permission.”

• Make sure your teen uses privacy settings that limit access to who can view her online profile.

• Have your teen limit friends to people she actually knows, not strangers; review her friend list.

• Help your teen create a safe screen name that won’t reveal identifying personal information, such as where she lives, gender, or age.

• Explain to your teen why some things, such as telephone numbers, addresses, and financial information, should stay private.

• Listen to their Fears and concerns without judgments -- If they don't talk to you, they might be getting bad advice online -- Yikes!
  

• Know the friends-Space but not too much!

• Help them become independent, but give them a sense of belonging

• It’s only partly hormones

• Unconditional Love is paramount

• Set Rules based on your Values and Morales

• Punish the behavior (correction not anger)

• Be Consistent and Loving

• Know the School Rules

• Teach your Child good decision making skills

• Be familiar with their friends and hangouts

• Know about what they read, see, listen and interact

• Teach them to be safe

• Seek out resources (other parents, counselors, teachers)

Resources:

www.teensafe.com ($15/month is monitor all communication on child’s phone)

www.netsmartz.org (tips and videos for parents and kids)

www.dosomething.org/facts/11-facts-about-sexting (tip sheet)

School Counselor and/or professional counselors

Children’s Healthcare of Atlanta – PowerPoint on Social Media Tips

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Contact: Schedule an initial session with Bree today for more parenting guidance. Bree Winkler is a licensed professional counselor and school counselor in Atlanta, GA.

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