Do you ever notice how easy it is to slip into disrespect – via tone of voice, actions, and/or words? We all want respect, but what do we do to earn respect? The Golden Rule is “treat others the way you want to be treated.” However, the selfish mentality is “I’ll treat them with respect when they treat me with respect.” You Want the Respect before you Give them Respect.
Choosing the later causes several problems:
Choosing the later causes several problems:
· Feel hurt and disrespected: When you don’t receive respect, your confidence decreases and you develop anger and resentment towards that person.
· Anger: You display your hurt by projecting anger at the other person. You may lash out verbally (name calling, insults, cursing, arguing, threats), physically (invade personal space, hit, slap, vandalize), or passive-aggressively (ignore, refuse to communicate, sarcasm, eye rolling, sighing).
· Lack of Respect received: If you are waiting for respect, you might wait a looooong time!
· No control over your behavior: Your actions are reactions. You lack the ability to think through situations when you only reactive negatively to the stimuli.
· Problem Solving skills not developed: Each situation is unique. You must 1) Clarify the actual problem, 2) Consider the possible outcomes/brainstorming with consequences, and then 3) Choose the best option for yourself. Without logically thinking about the situation and pursuing the best options, you are lacking a valuable life skill.
· Lose friends and colleagues: Disrespect is not tolerated easily by others. If you cannot give respect, others will pull away from you. Your stubbornness and pride will prevent you from making and keeping quality friends.
I asked hundreds of 6th grade students to design “bumper stickers” to promote the idea of RESPECT. Here is a sampling of what they know:
· Anger: You display your hurt by projecting anger at the other person. You may lash out verbally (name calling, insults, cursing, arguing, threats), physically (invade personal space, hit, slap, vandalize), or passive-aggressively (ignore, refuse to communicate, sarcasm, eye rolling, sighing).
· Lack of Respect received: If you are waiting for respect, you might wait a looooong time!
· No control over your behavior: Your actions are reactions. You lack the ability to think through situations when you only reactive negatively to the stimuli.
· Problem Solving skills not developed: Each situation is unique. You must 1) Clarify the actual problem, 2) Consider the possible outcomes/brainstorming with consequences, and then 3) Choose the best option for yourself. Without logically thinking about the situation and pursuing the best options, you are lacking a valuable life skill.
· Lose friends and colleagues: Disrespect is not tolerated easily by others. If you cannot give respect, others will pull away from you. Your stubbornness and pride will prevent you from making and keeping quality friends.
I asked hundreds of 6th grade students to design “bumper stickers” to promote the idea of RESPECT. Here is a sampling of what they know:
The benefits of giving Respect first include:
· Positive Attitude
· Healthy Relationships
· Good Character
· Respect from Others
· Pride in Your Actions
As human beings, we often want all the good things without putting in the work/effort to achieve the best results. However, staying on track to develop, practice, refine, and continuously implement life skills, including Respect, takes time and effort. If you are struggling with giving and receiving respect in your personal or professional life, give Bree a call today to schedule a life coach session.
Bree Winkler, LPC is a professional counselor in Atlanta, GA.
· Positive Attitude
· Healthy Relationships
· Good Character
· Respect from Others
· Pride in Your Actions
As human beings, we often want all the good things without putting in the work/effort to achieve the best results. However, staying on track to develop, practice, refine, and continuously implement life skills, including Respect, takes time and effort. If you are struggling with giving and receiving respect in your personal or professional life, give Bree a call today to schedule a life coach session.
Bree Winkler, LPC is a professional counselor in Atlanta, GA.
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